Confessions of a missionary wife on furlough

Furlough ... "a temporary leave of absence."  I think it's mostly a blessing ... It is nice to have a change of pace and a change of scenery and see people for the first time in years who have been an important part of our lives.  It's fun to shop in the States -- really fun.  The variety and great prices are wonderful.  If you live here, don't take that for granted.  What I would give for a Lifeway, a Kohl's, a WalMart, a Target or even a Dollar Store in Brazil.  Don't laugh at me because I'm pretty sure you would miss those places too if you no longer lived near them. 

And don't even get me started on the deals at thrift shops for practically brand new stuff that people just give away.  Incredible.  It's fun to go to the public library, the public parks, and all the variety of restaurants.  (In Brazil, I REALLY miss Mexican restaurants, mainly because of the chips and salsa.  I'm already a little sad just thinking about going without that for another four years.)

 Housework is easier in the States, too.  For whatever reason, houses do not seem to get so dirty as quickly, and therefore do not need to be cleaned as often.  Cooking is easier, doing laundry is easier, and doing dishes is easier.  (Yes, I am also a little sad thinking about not having a dish washer once we get back to Brazil. Can we say, spoiled?) 

There are some things that are harder here, though.  Like, pumping your own gas.  Haha, seriously, why do Americans have to get out and pump their own gas?  That is a luxury Brazilians enjoy and I have to say, I kind of miss that.  The whole weight gain thing is hard too.  Maybe that's because of all the chips and salsa and the easy housework.  And what is up with the coffee here?  I'm just saying ...

But on a more serious side, there are some aspects of furlough that I am struggling with.  It's not easy being in a different church on a regular basis, especially with our children.  It's hard enough to feel slightly pressured to be prepared for meetings and present our work in Brazil well to those who have partnered with us, but then you add in the variable of children, and well, it can get tough.  Why my kids choose the worst possible moments to be on their worst behavior is beyond me, but let's just say that I've had to fight back tears more than once because of how my children were acting in church.  And since I'm the missionary's wife, it probably wouldn't look good if I were to lose it in front of our supporting churches, even if one (or both) of my children is kicking (yes) and crying and screaming not to go into their class or running like crazy little people in the sanctuary and messing with the instruments and jumping off the stage (thankfully, this is not during the service). 

I struggle between missing my life in Brazil and everything that goes with it -- our friends, our ministry, our house, our familiar routine -- and being worried that our time on furlough is going by too fast and soon we'll have to leave the States and all the blessings of living here.  I appreciate meeting new people at our supporting churches and getting together over a meal with new and old friends, but I do not enjoy feeling the pressure of making sure my kids are behaving a certain way or that we are saying the right things.  Perhaps that pressure is self-imposed and I'm working on that because I realize that I cannot be perfect and the only One who is completely perfect knows my heart and understands my struggles and is there to help me when I am fighting feelings of doubt and inadequacy.

Recently, I bought a kids' cd for Gabriel and Juliana to listen to on our trips.  The songs are a little ... ok, a lot ... cheesy, but the words of one song kind of stood out to me.

When the sun shines bright and your heart is light,
Jesus is the Friend you need;
When the clouds hang low in this world of woe,
Jesus is the Friend you need.


 I liked the reminder that I need Jesus by my side regardless of whether I'm enjoying a fun outing with people I love dearly or whether I'm fighting tears of frustration over a situation that I am completely helpless to do anything about.  After all, isn't God the One who has ordained everything for my life?  Don't both good and bad work together to make me look more like Jesus?  And so, I pray that our furlough experiences, just like every other life experience, point me always back to Jesus and that I'm not too caught up enjoying my chips and salsa to see His hand in every thing that comes my way.

We have been back in the States for over a week now.  It's been a lot of fun.  I'm just going to post some pictures with a brief explanation that kind of summarize the last 10 days or so.  

We are thankful for friends who came to say goodbye the day before we left.  It feels good to know you are loved and will be missed. 

Gabe was so excited to go on his first plane ride that he can remember.  We are thankful for safe flights and smooth traveling.

I am thankful for my little boy who loves super heroes.  This was in the Rio airport during our long layover.

I'm thankful for family who got up super early to be at the airport to welcome us back.

Starbucks ... yes, I'm thankful for that.  Had to stop there on the way home from the airport.

Our home church has graciously provided a beautiful, furnished house for us to live in during our furlough.  The kitchen table was piled with fun groceries and gifts from people in the church. I'm thankful for how the body of Christ shows love for each other in such tangible ways.

Per my request, my family went to a Mexican restaurant the first night we were back.  Chips and salsa ... how can you not be thankful for that?  Try going without it for 4 years, and then you'll understand.

I'm very thankful for my precious little girl who turned 2 on Sunday.  We had a party for her at a very crazy, crowded, loud Chuck E. Cheese's. 

I'm so thankful that I got to be here to see my dad baptize both my brother and my oldest nephew. 

My parents and siblings -- together again after 5 years or so.  I'm thankful for each of them and the fact that I can be near them for the next few months.

Here are some other things that I've been very thankful for this week that I don't have pictures for:

* Having a car to borrow while we look for one to buy

* Parks and libraries to take the kids to (for free)

* Wal Mart and Target :)

* A bag of groceries left anonymously at our doorstep one morning

* An old friend bringing bags of groceries and staying to talk for a few hours

* A cool phone provided by friends who have added us to their plan while we're here

* A dishwasher

* The kindness of random strangers

* Hearing about one of our church ladies in Brazil teaching Bible stories in her child's public school



Four years ago, David and I landed in Brazil with our six-month-old baby Gabriel, pretty much clueless as to what the next four years would be like for our little family.  Now we are heading "home" for our first furlough and I can only praise God for his constant presence and direction in our lives.  To be very honest, if it weren't for our hope in God and our confidence that he has placed us here for now, we would probably have given up and left Brazil long before now.  But he is gracious, our Strength and our Provider, and it has been an honor to serve HIM these past four years.  Sometimes it feels like our efforts have been so meager in comparison to the overwhelming need all around us, but each soul who is converted and transformed by the power of the gospel is so very precious.  Each little seed of truth that is planted in a cold, lifeless heart has the potential to sprout and grow.  I know our work has not been in vain and only God knows the full effect the gospel will have in this spiritually dark place. 
Right now, I am praising God for building his church here in São José.  It has been so encouraging these past few months to see our little group grow spiritually, and also in numbers.  There were moments of (not so) quiet desperation in my heart that God didn't seem to be working, at least not the way I wanted him to and had asked him to.  There were times of deep discouragement for us as it seemed like prayers were going unanswered.  But all along, God was there with us, the Holy Spirit quietly strengthening and comforting us, encouraging us in unexpected ways, and lifting us up so that we could keep fighting this battle we're in for the lost. 

The past few weeks have flown by as we get ready to leave for furlough.  Here are some pictures of some happenings around here this past month. 



David went to Rio de Janeiro to speak at a youth retreat -- 8 messages in 5 days on living a cross-centered life

Our church group went on a one-day retreat ...



David's got ups!  :)

Exploring the camp site

Last Wednesday night, the power went out right before the service, so we all went to a member's house close by.  I had the intimidating task of teaching 20 kids, ages 1-12, in the living room but thankfully I had the help of several women for crowd control. 

The kids have been earning points for different things and Wednesday night was their awards night.

This is most of our church group, minus one family, who was there Wednesday night.  How would you like to unexpectedly host this number of people in your home for a church service?   

Having café da tarde with our sweet neighbor who, along with her family, has been such a blessing to our ministry.



Having last visit opportunities with our church people.  This past week, every night we either had someone over or were at church. 





Ladies' meeting on Saturday afternoon.  Our hostess invited some of her unsaved neighbors to join us, and two of them came.  One of them asked to host the next meeting at her house.





Sunday night we were encouraged to have 45 people in attendance at church.  We also had communion and the church people graciously surprised us with a going-away party for us afterward. 

Thank you to those of you who have faithfully prayed for us and supported us during our first term.  I know it's cliche, but it's true that we couldn't have done it without your help.  We look forward to seeing many of you soon!

They're Back!

I can't tell you what a blessing it has been to have James and Christen back.  We've had many, many conversations, often late into the night, and that's just in the first week.  It is so encouraging to have family who are our close partners in ministry, who love Jesus, who share our love for the people we work with, and value the things we value. 

The day they arrived, David, Gabriel and I headed to the airport to pick them up.  We were right on schedule and had planned to stop at a church member's house to pick up his car since not everyone would fit in ours.  It was raining, and about 10 minutes into our drive, our car broke down.  Thankfully, this ...

... is the place we broke down in front of.  Rough translation:  "Did your car break down?  Badu fixed it."  However, the sign does not include the disclaimer that if it's between noon and two, Badu will not be available to fix your car.  So David called a friend to come pick him up and Gabriel and I got a city bus back home to wait. 

Gabe enjoying the bus ride

6 people and 2 suitcases and several carry-ons fit into this car

Both David and Neguinho missed James' company :)

 

Big cousin Hannah has lots of fun stuff for Juju to play with

Brazilian pizza for their first night back

The next evening, our church group surprised James and Christen by all showing up at our house, serenading them with a couple of songs and bringing lots of food for us all to eat.  It was their idea and I thought that it was a really special way to make James and Christen feel welcome.

 (you'll never guess what that cake is made out of -- layers of sandwich bread with beets, carrots, ham and chicken salad, all covered with mayonnaise "icing" and decorated with peas and tomatoes -- it was delicious)

It was great to have a good group of people out for our Sunday services the next day.  Please continue praying for us and our work here in Brazil.

Random Thoughts

Life has been keeping us busy these days.  David is preparing 8 messages to preach at a youth retreat next week, and we are getting things in order for James and Christen's arrival this week (yay!) and the transition that will follow as we get ready to leave for furlough. 

We have been blessed with the arrival of three new families in our church.  They are believers and are already jumping in and helping where they can -- music, cleaning the church, taking care of the nursery, and this week the men are going to help David clear off the empty lot beside the church building so that it can be used.  It has been so encouraging to see them embracing our little group of new believers as their brothers and sisters in Christ, even though they didn't know them until about a month ago.  The body of Christ is awesome. 

On Saturdays, David goes out and does some door-to-door witnessing.  Usually he goes alone, but this week he had someone unexpected join him.  They came to one house and clapped (the Brazilian version of ringing the doorbell), and then they clearly heard the lady of the house yell to her daughter, "I don't want to speak to evangelicals!"  David was ready to walk on, but Roberto, who was with him, suggested he wait a minute.  When the woman saw Roberto, her expression changed as she recognized him as the photographer who had recently taken some family pictures of them.  She invited him and David in, and listened while David presented the gospel to her.  She said that she plans on taking her two teenage children to visit our church sometime, so please pray that she does.

Thank you letters were given to the parents of the kids who came to our club a couple of weeks ago, and in the letter was the address for the church website.  One girl, who has been coming to our services since the club, left a comment on the website saying that she loved our church and that her life is already being changed and that she wants to accept God.  Please pray for Duda, that she will understand the gospel, place her faith in Christ, and be transformed by God.

I was recently giving a gospel presentation using the worldless book bracelets to my Wednesday night children's class.  Larissa, a little girl who has been coming with her family for almost 2 years now, asked me how does someone place their faith in Christ.  She and I talked after class about it, and after our conversation, she said that she would like to place her faith in Christ and prayed, asking God to forgive her of her sins and asking for His help to trust in Him.

Larissa, on the right



We are so glad to have James and Christen and their kids back with us.  We've had a lot of good conversations, but there's a lot to catch up on after 8 months apart.  Their arrival here deserves its own post, so I will blog about that later this week. 



Cousins Juliana and Hannah getting reacquainted